Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
