sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
