Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
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