You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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