fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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