Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
