Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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