You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
