i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
