Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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