found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
