Sponge bath it is.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
