oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
