nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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