Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize