Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
