u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
