you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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