No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
