just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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