she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
cat food counts as protein by the way
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
