let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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