it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
