I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
