I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize