I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
