spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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