I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
