If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize