is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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