girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize