when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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