if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I wish i was in the wii world.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
