im drinking this country out of the recession.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
