So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
