Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
