Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
