i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
