did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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