At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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