Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
