If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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