Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
