Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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