some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
