I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
You made out with two different species that night
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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