quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize