I'm going to jail i love you
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I still have a little drunk in my system
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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