Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize