I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
